Synonym Discussion of INTEGRITY

honesty, honor, integrity, probity mean uprightness of character or action. honesty implies a refusal to lie, steal, or deceive in any way. honor suggests an active or anxious regard for the standards of one’s profession, calling, or position. integrity implies trustworthiness and incorruptibility to a degree that one is incapable of being false to a trust, responsibility, or pledge. probity implies tried and proven honesty or integrity. —Merriam-Webster [http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/integrity]

Greetings, good listeners. In my preceding post, Initiation into Fifth Dimensional Experience, I discussed the four stages of fifth dimensional initiation as I perceive them to have been identified in Matt Kahn’s original presentation, The first Wave of Ascension is Near .  In his discussion of the second stage, honor, one of the points that Matt himself had made refers to the manner in which acting with honor reflects a respect for ourselves. Today, I would like to share some of my own experiences in exercising this important quality of fifth dimensional development. As academics like myself are prone to do, I will begin by indulging in a bit of definitional word play, largely because I tend to use the word ‘integrity” in association with what Matt refers to as behaving with honor and self respect.

Integrity is “adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values: incorruptibility.” When we behave with integrity, we can be trusted to adhere to the standards which we claim to be our own. We do not waiver from our own standards, and in so doing, we respect and honor ourselves. We do not waiver even when confronted with others who may otherwise provoke us to do so. It is almost comic to observe someone who strikes out in anger at someone else BECAUSE the other person has struck out in anger at them. What did you say ? You are screaming in anger at that person because they have screamed in anger at you and you are offended by people who scream in anger at others? Say what?  Well, here I am doing the LOL thing so many of my readers enjoy abbreviating; I just have to laugh out loud.

Well, maybe you don’t share my sense of humor. Worse still, sometimes such situations are not at all funny. Just think of all the ways in which people hurt others BECAUSE they believe these others have hurt them– it will spare my having to provide any gruesome details. You get it. It really isn’t so funny. Perhaps some of you will be willing to share some examples in your comments. Instead of my providing more abstract examples of experiences that everyone has had numerous times ad infinitum, let me recount a few examples of my own self-conscious effort to behave with integrity in the face of challenging circumstances.

The experience which comes most readily to mind was brought about by my need to earn a living despite an equally pressing need to work toward finishing my doctorate at the University of Missouri-Columbia. After many years teaching college and enjoying the respect of my students and my co-workers, I found it necessary to temporarily abandon my rather comfortable, relatively well-paying occupation in order to finish my dissertation. As is the case with many graduate students, money was tight. I entered my application for work into the Missouri state employment system. I waited and waited for days and weeks, expecting to be notified that there was an opening nearby that would help me earn a living while I continued my academic work. Finally, I called the employment agency and asked why I had not heard from them. Their reply? We can’t find any jobs for someone like you (someone who had many years experience as a college teacher).

I then realized that the employment agency had misunderstood my intent and my need. I needed WORK, period. I was not looking for a job with status or prestige; I was looking for ANY job that was both legal and ethical. I needed the money much more than I needed the social respect that I had come to enjoy as a college professor. After explaining that to the employment agency, it was only a few short days before I received a call. Would I be willing to load trucks for a nationally affiliated moving company? You’re darned right I would.

I immediately recognized this situation as an opportunity, not just to make money–$3.50 an hour did not qualify even back then as a great opportunity to make money. It was an opportunity TO PERSIST IN WHO I AM REGARDLESS OF CIRCUMSTANCES, HIGH OR LOW. I literally told myself, “I am who I am, no matter what I do for a living; no matter whether I am held in high esteem by others or low; no matter how others treat me, I am determined to be the same person. It does not matter what I do for a living. It only matters how I behave in my daily interaction with others.” Was it a challenge? Yes it was. But what others might consider a hardship was in fact a blessing, an opportunity to learn how to be the one I want to be regardless of circumstances. This experience is exactly what Matt Khan has urged us to honor. And when we behave honorably in it, we honor ourselves.

It did not take long for me to be faced with one of those circumstances of which I spoke earlier, wherein others are behaving toward us in ways that we ourselves do not wish to behave. There it was, another challenge and another opportunity to practice behaving honorably. This challenge came in the person of my immediate superior as it were, someone who had seniority as a packer/loader at the warehouse where I worked. I will call him Phil. Phil could not read or write. He could not afford false teeth, so he had no teeth at all and a speech impediment that probably was exacerbated by that fact. He was hard of hearing and hard to understand when he spoke. He also had a bad temper and very little patience. He was nothing like the people with whom I was used to working as a college professor. He was my boss.

None of the other packer/loader/drivers wanted to work with Phil. It was readily apparent why. Frankly put, he was a pain to work with. He raised his voice at everyone at the slightest perceived deficiency in their performance. When he gave orders, one could only hope that we had understood what he meant. Working with Phil made a college professor feel very dumb–because that is how Phil treated everyone, as though they knew nothing and were undeserving of the slightest respect.

Ok, so that was my challenge. No, not working with Phil; transforming Phil into a friend who treated me with respect BECAUSE I treated him the way I wanted to be treated. At the time, I was very aware that I was engaged in a grand experiment. Could I, by being nice to Phil even when he was not nice to me (or anyone else), get Phil to behave differently toward me, value my presence instead of berating it?

Whereas the other dockworkers screamed back at Phil when he screamed at them, I did not. When he cussed at them, they cussed back. I did not. When he insisted that I drive nearly a hundred miles in the wrong direction because he did not have the patience to let me get a road map, I did not tell him he was illiterate and stupid. I just turned around and drove in the other direction!  When he insisted that I pack up the belongings of a customer who had told me NOT to pack them, what did I do? I explained to the nice lady that Phil did not understand what she had said, but he was my boss. I had to pack the items or he would explode in anger. The best I could do was show her where I had put them so she could unpack them. I learned to accommodate Phil’s difficult behavior without engaging in difficult behavior myself.

Did it work? YES!  My first evidence of this occurred some time after midnight on a very tiring drive back to the warehouse. Phil and I had been sent up into northern Missouri to pack a big farmhouse. We had arrived at the warehouse as instructed at 5:30 a.m. and, as was customary, worked until the job was done, putting me back home some time after 3:00 a.m. the following morning. Yep, that’s a long day’s work. We were exhausted and when Phil spotted a little all-night gas station, he motioned for me to pull the truck into the lot. He went inside while I waited behind the wheel. When he returned, he handed me a bottle of coke that he had bought for me. That may not seem like much to most people, but I immediately recognized it for what it was: Phil valued my friendship. A man who worked his fingers to the bone to eek out a very meager living had bought me a coke. It still means a lot to me. I still treasure that moment. In fact, it brings tears to my eyes as I write.

When you act with integrity, you honor both yourself and the others with whom you come into association. I honor the opportunity that was given to me to learn and to practice, even by what could be regarded as a difficult time in my life and even by people who did not treat me well. Those situations and those people served me as a catalyst. I honored myself by persisting in the behavior which I value despite the challenges and actions of others. That is true self respect.

Phil soon began asking for me to be assigned to his work crew. He noticed and complimented me when I slowed the truck for a stray dog limping along on the side of the road. He wanted to work with me because he knew I would not mistreat him and he began to treat me the way I persisted in treating him. He did not want to lose the company of someone who treated him with respect. No one does, really. You know, it’s the golden rule. It works not only to improve our behavior but to improve the behavior of everyone. I promise.